We survived the first week, but just barely. I definitely lost my shit this morning when I couldn’t find the piece to one of the kids’ lunch tiffins that makes the whole thing snap together, so I guess you could say we’re officially back in the swing of things. HA!
The truth is this. I don’t have time to write every day. Not even close. I didn’t get dinner on the table until 9 PM last night, and I most certainly did not fold the laundry in the dryer like I said I would. Nor did I go to the gym. There are five individual schedules to maintain during the week and each one of them is different. It’s a little like spinning plates, I imagine, just as you get one balanced another begins to wobble. I’m constantly doing at least three things simultaneously, with never an opportunity to focus completely on just. one. thing. It’s only the third day of school and I’m already looking forward to our first long break! I’m coming for you, Thanksgiving!
Unfortunately, the one struggling the most during this transition is Roux. He’d really grown accustomed to being surrounded (and doted on, ahem) by his entire family all day long, and then one morning 3/5 of us disappeared for hours. I’m trying to help him as best I can, with extra snuggles and all the comfort nursing his tender heart desires, but I’m also finding it challenging to get anything else done besides. And I had such high hopes!
Instead of trying to control the course, I’m trying to flow with it, a distinctly different approach from my usual tendency to freak out when things don’t go as planned. We’ll see how long this lasts.
We’re off a running! Today went rather smoothly as far as first days go, fingers crossed we’re able to maintain this positive momentum. The baby didn’t even wake up to give me a goodbye kiss this morning, the little bugger, and I even had big plans for a sunrise walk, just the two of us! He was extremely thrilled when I returned and was not willing to let me out of his sight for too long for the duration of the day. He was adamantly opposed to staying with his siblings in the playspace at the gym this afternoon, so I scratched my work out and we all headed for the pool.
I am learning to squeeze what I can into the spaces I can find, and to take advantage of moments as they are presented. And, most importantly, to let the rest go. A little each day goes a long way into the care and maintenance of our home, is what I’ve learned this summer. I’m trying my best to implement small but regular rituals that keep me from getting too overwhelmed with the tiny tasks that can pile up into giant workloads.
Trying to go to bed at a reasonable hour is something else that I aspire to, but I find that once the kids are asleep and all is quiet, my mind springs to life. When else am I going to find the time to work on my own projects?! Or spend quality time with my husband, for that matter? These are the questions that literally keep me up at night!
More hours in the day, or a slower march of time. Is that too much to ask?
It’s here, the first school night of the year is here. We’ve had ourselves twelve weeks of late nights, lazy mornings, with a general looseness to our schedule that just doesn’t exist for nine out of twelve months. It’s been beyond nice, heavenly really, and as there are only a couple hours separating us from the start of our new rhythm, there is nothing left to do but declare this season finished.
But, oh! She was really something special. I’m a little sad to see her go, Summer 2015, but I do like her friend Autumn very much, and rumor has it this one is going to be particularly festive.
(I’m up much later than I should be for a girl with an alarm to face in the morning.)
This was a really good summer filled to the brim with lots of precious family time, which is exactly what I had been craving. Roux’s arrival really knocked everyone out of orbit just a little bit, in the way new babies often do, and it was during this season we found ourselves humming along, each of us having adjusted more or less to the new dynamic within our tribe.
I know that it has taken me an especially long time to reconnect with myself, and I’m almost certain I haven’t yet done so completely, but there was something about this last full moon that brought me a tremendous amount of clarity as if the path I have been searching for has finally been illumined.
The year ahead is suddenly exciting and full of potential whereas a few weeks ago I could barely even think about school starting without my heart racing. I am not at all looking forward to saying goodbye to my tiny guy each morning, but I am eager to create new weekly rituals during the hours we will have together, just me and him.
The back-to-school to-do list is looming and I confess it got the better of me yesterday insofar as my negligent posting. However! I am owning that list like you wouldn’t believe. Our house is just about Chrysler Building Sparkly, and I’ve been promised a present should I manage to keep it properly tidy for an entire month. I miiiight even attempt an actual home tour, but let’s not get too ahead of ourselves.
I’m debating a third cup of coffee, which is never a good idea. It’s only that today is the very last lazy Saturday and I want it to linger just a little while longer. Or forever, whatever.